Ponder

I wake up some days pondering the meaning of this life's existence
and how this all comes together to make one collective unit that we call "living"
It has nothing to do with what we really are because we have no idea,
No clue, not one facet of our existence is truly open to us, were not privy.
We do the best we can though, we wear our masks and continue to hope
that someday, someone will see a glimpse past our masks and teach US to cope,
We do this because we have no idea what, or who we are, but we wish to learn 
from someone that saw past our masks and wishes to keep us around or us them,
its hard you know, this thing called living, not just for life's races and challenges
trully living is hard, how are we supposed to put a picture puzzle together if
we have no idea what the thing looks like when its done, is it scarred?

there's only a few solutions, the most popular of which are one by one
slowly you take the pieces and you never know when you're done but you have fun sometimes....
the second is take all the pieces or at least some of them and try to force them
all together just to see what happens, just to see if you can make them fucking fit!
I preffer a combination of those two plus my own way of only taking sections
of the puzzle pieces, not all at once, and throwing those together as i quince.
I used to try to force them together but that never ended well for one another
I like to see where they land so i see what i have to work with, to mold with,
to put together and behold it. 

All in all I still know nothing, none of us do, we spend our limited lives
aspiring to be something, facing challenges, or just plain doing nothing
whenever the end comes, and it will for everyone, no, just plain no.
is the answer to the riddle, will any of this really matter in the end?
The answer is already given so excuse me if i dont say it again
Of course it wont, to think otherwise is almost moronic, tired, and spent
what will matter though is what you left behind in peoples heads, the smiling faces
when thinking of your memory, and then they end too, kinda sad aint it? but that's not the point.
This is what our life boils down too and its the only one we have so what will you do?

Stop taking yourself so seriously.

We spend our youthful lives searching for who we are
finding something to believe in is the greatest fucking feeling
some of us take it too far, some of us only pretend
some of us keep it going and dont know when it'l end
we try so hard for this one thing and put so much effort forth
getting more and more dedicated and against others our time is spent


sometimes we get so lost in that one thing that we lose sight
lose the sight of actual life, we cant all sleep in a neverending dream
of our own self created reality.. what good is living if you dont
explore all things, if your dedication to that one thing stops you
from enjoying others and stops you from going toward something that
you dont even realize will make you happy or give you enlightenment
in some way.. open mindedness is never crappy...

as childish as that rhyme was i thought it would get my point across
dedicate your life to doing what makes you smile, but keep that mind open boss
cause you never know if that thing you love will end up getting you across
a bridge you cant go back over, turn around, take a look back, or turnover


tl;dr... be open minded, and dont put all your eggs in one basket.

Ga2Ng0Sta6 (gangsta rap in less than 5 minutes)

You know you want a piece of us
those who try to run at as
its all a game bitch if you hit us its a bust
we the crew of hard kniccas you know that you can trust
if you a bitch or a snitch we get the crew to slap you up
so next time you should know
to step the hell up off the truck

if you a chicken head trick and you wanna'pproach click
you be welcome for a second dont you worry bout it bitch
suckin dick snortin coke smokin all our fuckin dro
but when you're done, fuckin ho we give yo ass the door,
the fuckin boot, get the hell up out our troop
we got the green we be mean and we just tryin to but a nut
so if you keep on steppin
I pull, out my weapon
the trigger goes bang bitch
and you know that you cant hang

gangstas we be digital, musical, logical, we be makin beats
that go straight to the vaginal, crack, no we do not smoke it
and thats a fact, we sellin to these cluck 'n ass bitches
you should know knicca ho

the names the stp and im a fuckin pimp
the whiteboy with a big dick and
a motherfuckin limp

Entrance

Those eyes entrancing i saw them again
If i start to notice I'll slip and let them get in
They'll infect my mind and it wont be kind
this bind I'll find myself entwined
unable to unwind and focus on importance

Hold on, pause, rewind and come back a minute
is this really not important at all?
pretentious I may be but this is hardly minute
its worth some attention or even a phone call
the issue is distinction, when and when not to




and to boot this is me i dont even know about you
so this point ends up being fairly moot
when you think something is the truth
and it turns out not to be so you end up tasting soot
shes a lot more bitter unadulterated

unaltered? or un-adulterated words are up to interpretation
even with meaning the same it takes some investigation
to figure out true meaning and connection
but isn't that more fun, and then you throw in libation
that's when you start the true instigation

???

Bah... Cold, too cold to sleep, eat, drink or fuck
my blankets are cold I would do homework but 
my hands shivering cant hold a pencil let alone give a flying duck
Vampires dont like chocolate?
Didn't know that.. I didn't see a truck today, no red truck

I try, thats me

looking at these bandages
its making me thing about life again
watching her make choices about love again
she wants someone like me who understands her frame

someone like me who knows her mind
someone like me who knows her well
someone who understands her needs to no end
someone whose there when she needs a friend

little does she know that she has it now
someone who knows to treat her how
she wants to be treated with care she needs only when
shes feeling overwhelmed and needs advice now and then

she already has it but is blind to
this feeling from a friend that isn't new
she wants someone like me who knows her through
who gives her what she wants, and never fails to

inform her with the knowledge of my opinion
that she should try to make with precision
she has what she wants but for some reason true...
she doesn't want me she wants you

not mine but its called "Guarantees" good shit

These warehouse wages
Kill the ends introduction
man I should have schooled it up
When I was younger should have stuck to plan
Always had the dreams of being more self assertive
And my kids a teenager now he needs the health insurance
So break my body
Break break my soul down
Just another zombie walking blindly through your ghost town
Pull up to the bar to politic and tap the power
Aint nobody really all that jolly at your happy hour
But I don’t want to go home yet
So I’m gonna talk to my cigarette
And that television set
It doesn’t matter what brand or station
Anything to take away from the current situation

No overtime pay no holiday
Months behind on everything but the lottery
Went around the corner guaranteeing that my car died
Wifey having trouble trying to juggle both the part times
My cup aint close to filled up
We trying to build up so we can have enough
And when I finally get the color
There won’t be nothing left to paint on
A friend of mine tried to kill himself to the same song

My better half is mad at making magic out of canned goods
My tax bracket status gotta questioning my man hood
My shorty got caught smoking weed at a concert
And if I smack em everybody treats me like a monster
My neighbors aint doing much better
And we making competition instead of sticking together
Cant save no nest egg in fact this nest is rented
In fact that rent is late, wait
The money aint here the raise aint coming
Just me and my son and that crazy woman
And those bartenders this whole fucking country
Got everybody swallowing that lunch meat
Maybe we can speed up the process
Kill me in my thirties in the name of progress
Put me in the dirt and then change the topic
Some time it seems like the only way to stop it
Contemplate my departure date
Doesn’t take a lot to get a lot of us to talk this way
Take a shot at me that's all i'm obligated for
Apparently my only guarantee is a walk away

The only guarantee in life is a life worth dying for
The only guarantee in life is a life worth dying for
Cause death don’t wait for no one
Sitting on your front door
The only guarantee in life is a life worth dying for
Cause death don’t wait for no one
Sitting on your front door