system slave

stand alone in this four cornered room...
well actually six, if you count the hole where
the shit and piss is strewn
time is not on my side in this cell of mine
with my mind unwinding with books I read
the rumbling of my stomach and stale air to breathe
No window, no door to the outside, the
only way I see it is dreams
or the clock ticking by while inmates scream

I guess its not all so horrible, it could always
be worse my grandmama said as she was trying to keep composure
on my grandfathers deathbed...
That's when I found the window, the one place where the outside was
visible, great view, but the 10th floor made everything so minuscule
in comparison to the harassment some cuts went through

From the new kids crying silently to the old timers tussling violently
we all live in this fucked up college dorm of stupidity as time
ticks by ever infinitely

I sit in my cell alive and 'wake
I pray the C.O's my body not to take
and If I die before they sleep I pray the morgue my body to keep
To tag my toe with numbers unique
A system slave, in even death they keep.

I'm not depressed

met a girl that puts smiles on my face
I met a girl that brings me some sunrays
in this dark ass world I call my life
I'm not depressed, its this world its this
world thats oppressing

She really presses my buttons the right way
unlike the rest, this test we call life knows no rest
im obsessed with liking it when she tastes my
whiskey breath, but I digress in my flow
because my thoughts are a jumbled mess

working, loving, playing, hating, switching
up and sometimes forgetting to look
for higher meaning, the truth you're believing
is sometimes inadequate and deceiving all while
the puns work their way into my music

its inevitable this play we choose to act in it
the actors are the pawns and im in the kingship
pretending to rule my world with a faint kind of grimace
knowing damn well that my thoughts control my actions
and knowing all too well that my emotions control the actress

I feel its me and this girl just fighting against the world
while I struggle with the actions that dictate my habits
all in the while my feelings dictate my business